Wednesday, March 26, 2014

A Mixed Bag

Match day has come and gone and I can still hardly believe it.  I feel like I have been holding my breath for so dang long!  And now that I can finally come up for air I’m not sure I even remember how!

We will be living in MAINE….for the next FOUR years.

How can a person feel elated, relieved, terrified, and even a little sad all at the same time?  It’s definitely a mixed bag of emotions!

ELATION

First of all I couldn’t be more excited for and proud of my husband Jentry for matching into an Anesthesia Residency.  He has worked so hard and sacrificed so much to get to this point.  He has grown and matured so much in the past four years.  I have been so impressed by his tenacity and perseverance, especially this past year.  He deserves this 100%!

Second, how cool is it we are moving to MAINE!  Woods, lakes, streams, beaches, hiking, skiing, camping, canoeing, moose, loons, lobster, chocolate, flannel, boots…oh WOWZERS…I feel like I am going to burst from the insides out!  I just can’t wait to get there and start exploring and adventuring!

RELIEF

I just want to clarify by saying that I never doubted Jentry for a single second.  I knew from the time I first met him that he had so many qualities that would make him an amazing doctor.  But graduate medical education is not a cake walk.  Medical school has  been so full of challenges, obstacles, uncertainties, and anxieties; it was hard not to feel at times like the world was against us, like The Man just wanted to keep us down and worst, like the system that is supposed to be designed to serve us would fail!  But now we get to breathe a little sigh of relief before we take on the next round that life has to offer us!

TERROR

After we wound down a little from dancing around the kitchen, texting our families, and facebooking the world, I hopped on the computer to search the route from Phoenix to Portland.  2700 miles, 40 hours, and 12 states stand between us and Portland.  WHOA.  That is FAR.  AWAY.  Away from family, away from friends, and away from everything I have ever known in my life.  It would be and understatement to say that I am a little overwhelmed at the prospect.  But don’t worry, I only slip into COMPLETE PANIC MODE about fifty hundred times each day!

SADNESS

As much as complain about Arizona, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t going to miss it.  Jentry and I came here four years ago not knowing what to expect.  We didn’t know how hard medical school was really going to be.  We didn't know how hot 120 degrees really felt.  We didn’t know how miserable it would be when it is still 100 degrees everyday in October.  We didn’t know how much it sucks to fall in a cactus when you are mountain biking.  We didn’t know how beautiful an Arizona sunset could be.  We didn’t know how awesome it would be to be hiking, biking, and enjoying baseball games in 80 degree March days when the rest of the world is still in winter deep freeze.  We didn’t know we would get to be a part of the most incredible, amazing, and fun group of friends around.  We didn’t know we would experience the sorrow of miscarriage here.  We didn’t know we would have the joy of welcoming a sweet baby boy into our family here.  These experiences have strengthened both of us and caused us to grow closer to one another.  Arizona will always hold a special place in our hearts! And yes, I am a little sad to be leaving!

So like a said, it’s a mixed bag.  I guess that’s what keeps life interesting!

4 comments:

Camille said...

I love this! I'm so excited for your new adventure in Maine! And that is great for Jentry! I loved your description of emotions on moving. It reflects my feelings so well on our move to Alabama! But, they don't have lobster or chocolate. :) It is fun to move and experience new things and grow. I look up to you and I'm so glad you're my friend. Good luck on your move and I hope some day in the not so distant future we get to catch up!

Hide said...

Thanks Camille! I am always missing you so much! You are definitely my inspiration when I get scarred and overwhelmed thinking about this great big move and the big challenges we've got facing us right now! Hope you guys are doing well in Alabama!

DuncanAndCandice said...

I am so excited for you guys!!! What an exciting move. I wish your little family the best. I can't wait to follow your family on your blog!!! LOVES

Alyssa said...

I came on your blog randomly, and saw a new post! I love it. Keep it up!! I'm so happy and excited for you guys!!